50 Shades of BFD

Okay, so. I know I'm late to the book porn party but I FINALLY started reading 50 Shades of Grey.  I had avoided reading it simply BECAUSE everyone else was.  Everyone was also talking about it nonstop so I almost felt like I didn't have to read it. I had a pretty good handle on it.

My hairdresser read this book on her cruise and foisted her copy off on me while gushing about how awesome it was.  You guys, my first book porn was Ann Rice's* Sleeping Beauty when I was 19. I found it stuffed in the backseat of a used car the guy I was dating at the time had just purchased.  Never one to pass up a free book (or any book, really) I dove right in.

50 Shades ain't* Sleeping Beauty.  This isn't even close.

The book sat on my counter for 2 days mocking me before I sighed in resignation and began reading it.  Almost 100 pages in, TWH asked me how I liked it.  My response was "So far, it's 50 Shades of Big Fucking Deal".  His response "Oh..."

I think he may be waiting for the porn part to kick in.

I can't believe how unrealistically Ana is written.  Never masturbated??  Really??

I'm going to finish this book.  One of my quirks is that I can NOT put a book down unfinished. I will hold on to the thought that it will get better until the very end when I have a total "What the HELL??  That's it??  I spent DAYS reading this book and it sucked from beginning to end??  Sonofabitch!!" moment.

It could always get better...  Right??  RIGHT!?!?


* Ann Rice wrote the Sleeping Beauty trilogy under the name A.N. Roquelaire. (Spelling??)

*Yes, I used Ain't.  I'm Southern. I only use that word to indicate extreme derision. It is NOT part of my daily vocabulary.