Okay, so. Monday I kinda had a breakdown. It was awful and tear stained and snotty and full of paralyzing agony, self pity, and self doubt.
I spewed it out all over my blog. I tried just writing it in my journal but it didn't seem enough. I started this blog last July as a lark but what began as a lark has become an outlet. A lifeline of sorts.
I put my humor and my pain here. I considered putting just the humor but that didn't seem genuine. No one is happy all the damn time. So I write it all. The good, the bad, and the ultimate fails that are my life.
I realized today that I'm on my way back. I realized it in traffic. I was calling some girl who was too busy putting on her makeup to actually drive a "Stupid Twat" and yelling how that was "An AT HOME job" when I realized that I actually cared enough to bitch. For the first time in days I cared enough about what was going on around me to form an opinion and voice it. The bone crushing apathy is lifting. It's not gone but it's packing up and getting ready to leave for awhile.
So many of you commented Monday. So many of you lifted me up. I am so grateful for that.
I'll be back to full on snark soon. Promise.