Tuesday, January 31, 2012

I Can Pepper Spray People!!

Okay, so.  Today after we got back from lunch, T & I were in his truck gathering our things when suddenly, there is a guy on a bicycle giving T his looooonnnnngg sob story about why he needed money. While T is dealing with this, I text one of out cop clients. It went like this:
Me: There's some guy here panhandling.
Cop: Lol. I don't get to work til 2. Go pepper spray him.
Me: Don't give me that kind of permission.
       I'll go all crazy white girl with that shit.
Cop: I anoint you. Have fun. Lol.
Me: I'll be a fucking pepper spray ninja!!
Cop: Throw your shears at him like a ninja throwing star!!
Me: Bahahahahahahaha!!

I of course IMMEDIATELY text TWH with the good news.
Me: Cop just gave me permission to defend myself with pepper spray as I felt the need to!!
Me: I told him not to tell me that because I'd go all white girl crazy with that shit
TWH: Really??  He told you that??
ME: He said "I anoint you. Have fun." That's how I'm taking it. I now have permission from law enforcement to pepper spray people at will.
TWH: Oh Jesus...  I need to have a LONG talk with that man.
ME: You wanna be able to spray people too??

He never texted me back after that.

I'm going to the Police Supply place next Monday and buying myself a CASE of Pepper Spray. That oughta be a good start.


  1. Bring some with you in March - I need me some black market pepper spray.
    No, really! LOL

  2. Aaaawwww, man, I wanna be Annointed to Pepper Spray At Will! You gonna wear a cape?

  3. Julie: It's perfectly legal pepper spray
    Jent: Being me is highly overrated. Really.
    Jo: I SHOULD wear a cape!!


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.