Sunday, September 18, 2011
I Created This Monster
Okay,so. As everyone knows, I have a Crackhaid Dawg. He's 3 and Spoiled Assed Rotten. He's started barking in the evenings for no apparent reason and in an effort to get him to SHUT THE HELL UP, I started giving him his favorite chewy treats. They're called "Bully Sticks" in the store but we've dubbed them "Crack Sticks" because the Dawg acts like a fool to get them. Hence the name Crackhaid Dawg. I obviously am easily trained because now he's decided that since this latest internet-ordered batch is somewhat inferior to what he's used to and he can go through them in about 5 minutes flat, he needs a new one every 10 minutes or so to keep himself entertained and at the level of chewy treat induced euphoria he's accustomed to. I am obviously easily trained because I somehow fell right into this new Crackstick regimen without even realizing I'd done it until a few nights ago when TWH pointed out "You don't have to get him a Crackstick EVERY time he barks y'know". HOLY SHITBALLS!! I am being bullied into standing at the ready with a Crackstick on demand by a 12 pound, furry, curly-tailed TYRANT!! We are now in the midst of a Crackstick Intervention. We've all told the Dawg how his constant need for a Crackstick is making us crazy and this is for his own good. He just keeps standing by the refrigerator (his Cracksticks live on top of the fridge) and barking imperiously. I'm staying strong though. I've only given him 3 today... I created this monster, now I have to deal with him. Or punt him into the neighbor's yard. We'll just have to see how this all shakes out.