Thursday, September 8, 2011
Warning....I May Bite
Okay, so. In my last post, I talked about how I had to do something with myself because I was bordering on Colossal Fatass-dom and my Emergency Fat Pants (usually reserved for Holiday meals) have become part of my regular wardrobe. Well, I started paying attention to what went in my mouth & how MUCH went in my mouth and trying to work in a couple of miles walking/running a day. I have learned a few things due to my new fitness regimen. 1) The Crackhaid Dawg HATES when I walk him by myself. The first mile of my exercise regimen is walking the Dawg. He could use the exercise too. Now, when TWH is with us, we go along at the DAWG'S pace. When it's just the Dawg & me, I set the pace. I'm walking and I happen to have the Dawg with me. By the last leg of our mile, he is pissy because I won't let him stop to sniff every damn thing or pee on every mailbox. 2) Me running is NOT pretty. I am not fast. I am not consistent. I do not have good form. I sort of shamble along until I get tired. I have the feeling I look like Sasquatch on tranquilizers would look. Just less hairy. Now, considering I have, at one point or another, damaged my knees (by trying to play various sports) and I have 100 year old knees on a 40 year old body, I am happy with the fact that I can even SHAMBLE and will make peace with my Sasquatchy-ness. 3) Things start to hurt after a few days. In this case it's my upper legs and my ASS. I have no idea what muscle group I am over working by running/walking but my ass is sore and it kinda hurts to get up and walk after I've been sitting for any amount of time. I'm sure this too, will pass. 4) I'm fucking HUNGRY!! All. The. Damn. Time. I'm assuming this is a good thing and means my ass will soon be smaller and that I will be able to once again button my "Everyday" jeans instead of just doing up my belt with the button undone under it. However, my level of Hungry is directly proportional to my level of Bitchy. The Hungrier I get, the Bitchier I get. If you cross my path and I happen to bite you, don't take it personally. You probably didn't REALLY do anything to provoke me. I'm just Bitchy. Or you walked by me with a cookie.