Thursday, August 30, 2012

Don't Swear in Front of My Kid!!

Okay, so.  Thanks to Hurricane Isaac, we don't have power so I'm sitting at TWH's office typing this.  Everyone is comparing stories of how bad their lives are at the moment.  (Let me digress for a minute by saying not only do we NOT have power, I haven't had coffee in over 24 hours. So now, not ONLY did I have to take a cold shower this morning, I've barely slept, I'm uncaffeinated, and it's SHARK WEEK for me. I win mofos!! I motherfucking WIN!!)

Anyways, I'm set up in an empty cubicle at TWH's office with TB on his laptop in the next cubicle.  From over the wall, I hear some guy telling his tale of woe and he says "Fucking".  For some reason, THIS makes me cringe.  I started to stand up and give him The Death Glare while pointing to TB and saying "My KID is in this cubicle!!"  Because I'm a big ol' hypocrite. Obviously.

I've said before that I write like I talk. EXACTLY like I talk.  I can be heard at my house swearing like a sailor simply because I can't get some schmutz off a dish. Or I dropped something. Or I tripped over one of the Dawgs. Or it's a day that ends with "Y". Whatever. My point is, for some reason, I've decided it's perfectly fine for me to swear in front of my kids but for someone else to do it??
Oh. HELL. NO!!  It drives me batshit crazy.  Don't talk like that in front of my kid!!  I'M the only one that can talk like that in front of my kid!!

Inconsiderate Asshole. Watch your damn language already!!

12 comments:

  1. LOL!

    First of all: YES! You win. Hands down. No question about it.

    Second of all: I agree. I feel the same way about my potty mouth vs. others' potty mouths in front of my kids, and my husband tells me that I'm just being cranky, or PMS-y, or that I haven't had enough sleep or coffee or sex or whatever. And then I tell him to fuck off, go to hell, or to just shut his fucking mouth, that it's just how I feel, and it has abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do with anything else . . . and then I sometimes call him a fucktard.

    So finally: I humbly thank you for making me feel vindicated, now that I know there's at least one other person out there who feels like I do! Fuckin' A!

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    1. Kelly, you're most welcome. I do what I can.

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  2. Hell yeah! I may swear like a trucker but if anyone else cusses in front of my child, I will unleash the dragon!

    I have no problem being a hypocrite in that sense. :D

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    1. I wonder why we find someone else's swearing so much more offensive??

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  3. Hahahahahaha! This is SO me.. *I* can cuss in front of my kids but if someone else does it.. Hahahaha!! I totally get this.. Just proves you're a good mom.. Protecting your child. That's your job. Carry on mofo! ;)

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    1. I'm so glad I'm not alone in this!! It's funny, when I posted this TWH immediately who I was talking about.

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  4. bahaha it's exactly like when you talk shit about a member of your family - but God help the person who reiterates your comments - you want to beat the crap out of them!

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