Thursday, August 11, 2011

I am an (Accidental) Asshole

Yes, it's true.  I mentioned before that I seem to be missing the filter between my brain & my mouth. That and I just plain old don't pay attention sometimes.  A few years ago, I was hobbling around on crutches shopping with my family. We go into a store and lo and behold I see a bench!!  I plop myself down with a sigh of relief  and hear a voice from my right say "You seem to be having a time of it" to which I respond "Yeah, thankfully though, it isn't anything permanent". I turn to my right and discover the guy I'm talking to is IN A WHEELCHAIR.  Yep, I'm an (Accidental) Asshole AND I'm going to hell to boot., I did it AGAIN.  I have a client who is a slight, tattooed, guy who buses tables at the bar & grill across the street. Super-nice guy. Anyways, he was telling me about some training he's going to do and some really big job changes he's about to make. He's going to Dive School so he can work for an oil rig/platform.  I ask some questions about the school & new job then ask "So, are you going to have the silver on your bottom teeth removed for Dive School??".  See, I mistakenly thought he was sporting a "Grill".  He paused for a second before he responded "These are my teeth. I was in a car accident a few years ago where I was unrestrained and my teeth went through my lip knocking them out. This was all I could afford to replace them with."  Oh yeah, I'm a sensitive bitch. To add to my Asshole-ness, I was involved in a similar accident as a teenager and am standing there with my straight, white, teeth that were saved because my Mom came to school every day and brought me broth & bread until my teeth firmed back up then graduated me up to real food slowly just so they WOULDN'T fall out of my head, asking about HIS teeth.  Before you ask, I WAS nice enough to share that story with him. Remember, sensitive bitch, right here.  I ought to call my Mom...

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